Sunday, March 1, 2009

Another Week....

This past week has been a typically busy week! Although in another country I still feel as if I am constantly in my car picking up children, dropping children off and going to kiddo's functions! For some strange reason I assumed that life would not be as busy here-who was I fooling! On a normal week all three kids are in school, Taylor has swim practice twice a week, Hunter has tennis once a week, and cricket once a week, while Claire has horse lessons(therapy) once a week! Soccer starts this coming week and each boy will have practice for two hours per week, and golf starts next week, with one, one hour lesson! AHHHHHHHH!!!! Of course, we still have homework!
While living in the midst of all of that, I have promised myself that we would do something inclusive of Africa every week, if not every other week! I refuse to live in this beautiful country and not eat up the wealth of things to do! So this past weekend we went to Addo Elephant Park. http://www.addoelephantpark.com/ What a gorgeous place this is, this is a national park where you can stay and have guided safaris or drive through on your own for self guided safaris. We decided after church on Sunday that we would drive through on our own! It took us an hour to get there,and once there the fun began. After checking in we started our journey! We of course instantly saw Warthogs (slowly becoming a fav in the McCarty household) and then we drove and drove-this is typical sometimes you see a ton, and sometimes you do not. We came across a bunch of cars stopped and looking at something, we tried to ask what they were looking at, and after some communication gaps we discovered they had spotted a lion! I tend to have a lot of communication issues here, it is that southern accent-ohh the stares! We never saw what they saw, although Hunter said he saw a hair-that child! We then saw some Kudo, Ostrich (new fav meat), more warthogs, and tons of elephants. This is South Africa's hottest month, and we heard this is not a good time to see the animals-we knew this going in but were pleased with what we saw. Afterwards we stopped to eat lunch in the Park's restaurant and hit the gift store afterwards(one of my kid's favs)-Bought more Africa stuff to add to our growing collection. I am determined to get as much out of this country as I can!
We are headed to Cape Town http://goafrica.about.com/od/southafrica/ss/bestsa_2.htm this week, Pat is in a bike race and we are going to be gone for about 5 days! We are going to try and take in some of the sights and wonders of this part of South Africa-whale and penguin watching, beautiful scenery, and the wine country! Lets just hope we find our way there-this will be our farthest adventure yet! I will post about this afterwards! And then to Jeffery's Bay for a couple of days in early April!
A pretty surreal and humbling moment came this week, it is customary for most households to have a maid and in earlier posts I have explained how inexpensive labor is here. I have been through three maids so far, and none of them have suited our family. I was advised to go through a placement agency to find someone, and I did. I think my biggest problem with these ladies is me. I have the hardest time with someone working for me, most days I will cry after they leave because I know the sadness of their lives and I am also very easy to walk all over-some have taken advantage of that. This agency came highly recommended, but I was not prepared for what I found. For one it was in one of the townships(what they call the shack villages), so I felt a little uncomfortable driving into this place, and the other part was the utter sadness of the need for work! After talking to the placement lady she had a brief list of what we needed, and had gathered up 7 women to be interviewed. She gave me their resumes (CV's) and instructed me on what to ask, and then sent them one after the other. I felt extremely sad for these women who were almost begging to get a job, and the extent of the work they do -nanny, maid, cook. I was looking for an older lady that could run the house and cleaning with out being told how to do it-you have to remember I am in Africa and most people do not have an education and most have never seen a washing machine, dryer or dish washer. I ended up really liking this young girl from Zimbabwe, she seemed very eager to work and had experience with a family in JoBurg (Johannesburg) and one in Port Elizabeth. On her resume it said that both her parents were dead and she had left her 5 year old daughter in Zim to find work, something touched me when I talked to this girl -my heart went out to her! She has worked for us since Wednesday and my house has never been so clean, and organized. I know that you may be thinking SPOILED-yes, I am lucky but this is life here. We do pay much higher than the average employer here, and hope that this can make a differnce! This is the way the average South African lives, and this is the way the average person makes a living. Most maids are widowed and are raising their children, and usually someone else's - they rely on this work, as odd as it sounds we feel like we are providing for a family. When the maid is at our house we provide breakfast and lunch, they usually work from 8-5. My maid left today, and asked if she could live here, odd again, but a lot of maids live in-we actually have a maid's quarter. We do not want a live in and I explained this to her, we want to keep her so I am going to see what we can do. (On a side note, I am writing this info because I think it is important to let you know of everyday life-we employ to give someone an opportunity for work, not for the pure joy of a clean house, I actually do not like someone always in my house!)My heart aches for this girl, I have no idea where she lives, and sometimes you do not know if they have anything to eat. I always send food to them, and cry when she leaves-how lucky I am to have my children and a warm and dry place to rest my head! She is always talking to Claire, I wonder if this is when missing her daughter is the hardest.
Speaking of work, I know many of you are wondering about GM... We are OK , and are EXTREMELY lucky to be where we are- I say a prayer nightly that we will survive this economy crisis and GM will again sale cars. We are proud to work for this company and follow great men who worked their butts off at automotive plants-my dad, my grandfather, Pat's dad, Pat's grandfather! Please buy American and pray for the Americans that will suffer immensely if anything happens to General Motors!

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Last, But Not Least...



A daughter is the happy memories of the past, the joyful moments of the present, and the hope and promise of the future. ~Author Unknown

Claire is my princess, my pride! She is also growing up faster than I can grasp, although her journey is a much slower one, it is no less as wonderful as her brothers!

Here are some pictures down memory lane....
My first view of my princess...

How fast we grow...

The biggest eyes I have seen....

The sweetest smile....

Mischievous!!!!!!!


Claire has made me a better mother, and I am all the more blessed to have her!

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Brothers...



Sometimes brotherly love is hard to find, hard to separate and hard not to laugh at! Raising two boys has been a challenge, a joy ,and a journey, one that I continue to travel and love every moment of......

I was stopped cold the other day while trying to prepare for a scrapbook day! Of course I have never done any scrap booking in the last ten years of my children's life, but felt like it was about time! I came across some pictures of my boys that I sat and looked at for hours while wiping the tears from my eyes. Where did the time go, Have they really grown up, Will I always remember these days? I hope so! These have been the best days of my life, I know there is so much more in front of us, but what is behind us. Have I done a good job, Do they know how much I love them and how proud I am of them? Do they know how lucky they are to have each other-These are questions I ask myself all of the time. The answers may not come until later in life, but I can keep on trucking and let them know the importance of their lives to me!

Taylor is almost 11 and Hunter almost 8-OMG!
Here are a few of my favorite brother pics...............

The first days of being brothers!

A brother shares childhood memories and grown up dreams. Author Unknown
Sometimes being a brother is even better than being a super hero! Marc Brown

Walk with me, and be my friend for we will always have each other!
A brother is a friend given by nature. Jean Baptiste Legouve
I am sure we all have and are having wonderful memories of our children, keep those memories close to the heart. Squeeze those buggers now, because time is slowly ticking away and they are growing up way to fast!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Lines, lines, lines......

Weird title, yes! Even crazier once I explain, my life has been about lines lately! No, I am not talking about walking the drunk driving test line(of course, that would make for a much better story), but instead drawing a straight line! As my blog has shown Taylor Buds has been having a hard time with school...the day it looks like it is getting better is the day we have to deal with lines.
OK, we are in South Africa and things are going to be different, to be expected, but some things are VERY different! Background info-I have made an attempt to meet with the boys teachers individually to get a handle on what is expected, and to introduce ourselves. Hunter's teacher is great, Taylor's teacher is pleasantly referred to as "The Dragon"! Taylor likes to describe her as Mrs.______(worst teacher from old school-some may know name)'s grandma! Of course the child struggling gets the worst teacher! On my initial visit with her, she tells me Taylor is having a hard time with his lines-I say, I know(Taylor has clued me in), but he is trying! Do you want to know what lines I am discussing-drawing lines, yes lines on a paper-lines that divide the paper, lines underneath a problem, just *&% lines! He needs to get better at lines! Dear God, I thought maybe he needed to improve his spelling, his math or even maybe his handwriting, oh no... his lines. How do you go about improving this, you practice drawing lines using a ruler on paper(I mean come on, who has time for this shit!) So our pride and joy is doing better lines, so we think, until he walks to the car in tears, yes tears! His teacher, in red, has written on his paper-If your lines are not straighter, you will write 100 ruled lines. OK, were we drawing curves, maybe jagged lines-nope just 2 out of 10 lines his ruler slipped and at parts there was a double line. People, I am talking about the damn lines drawn down the middle of the page! I am pissed, so I call the principle, surely she will take my side and blow this over-Once again.. no, she states that straight lines is the school policy! WHAT! WHAT! ARE YOU KIDDING ME! I tell her very nicely, that I would think that the math problems would be the focus, not the lines! AHHHHH! What to do, we tell Taylor he must respect his teacher and try his best as I quietly think of taking up Voodoo! He says he does try, he is using a ruler! You may think, how hard is it to draw a straight line... I thought so to-but my 10 year old is having a hard time holding the paper, holding the ruler, and then perfectly drawing a straight line. Boys... if this was a girl I am sure the issue would never have come up! The schools here in South Africa really put a strong focus on handwriting and presentation! In fact, when we moved here both of my boys teachers said they needed some occupational therapy to sort out their paper work! I have explained that in the States, unfortunately, the teachers do not have time to focus on printing and handwriting or lines! I am not saying that my boys could not use a serious class in neatness, but come on! So our battle continues, we have introduced a wooden ruler to help out! There are other things I would like to focus on, but the focus remains on the line_____________!
More lines this past week...Running in between them! Taylor was selected to represent his school in the Eastern Cape Athletics Meet! This past Friday, Taylor ran a good long line! He finished 3rd out of 10 local schools in his event. I am very proud of my buddy, especially since he has not trained for this-just the occasional Sunday runs! He can run in a straight line, just not draw one!
Taylor can swim in a straight line too! He also represented his school at a swim meet this past weekend and swam the freestyle! My little athlete! Although we are missing one of our favorite sports, basketball, we are trying to keep involved in sports. He is swimming three times a week, taking tennis lessons, and is involved in a golf clinic!
Walk the Line My Boy(or draw the line)!
We do have other children(you may forget, how could I)....
Hunter is doing great! He is fitting into school and following along quite nicely. He has swimming once a week, cricket once a week, tennis clinic, and will also do a golf clinic! We must keep this child busy or he would turn into a couch potato! One thing about Hunter is, he always has that sweet toothless grin!
Claire is blowing me a away with her progress lately! She is almost completely potty trained, just waiting for her to tell us, she always goes when you ask! She is talking so much more! She definitely is putting two word utterances together and sometimes trys three words! We have recently diagnosed her with Childhood Apraxia of Speech, we have a long road ahead of us, but we will try to walk this line on top! She has also started her horse therapy and loves it-Buttercup is a hit and gets to be fed a carrot each session(needless to say, we have taken stock in carrots)! She now knows some colors, numbers and is learning the alphabet! She can point to an A and give you the sound!!!
I have yet to stop, as most moms know(it does not matter what continent you are on), but I am trying to add some stuff just for me! I am beginning my tennis lessons next week! Taylor's golf pro put a bug in my ear-golf lessons-Pat would pass out if he had to share the course with his wife! Somethings are best left alone! I do get a chance to grab an occasional coffee, and I have begun to meet some of the school moms -I really like one of them, she has a boy in Taylor's class and one in Hunter's class!
By the way, my fifth grade party was a success- I had 10-15 boys swimming, playing basketball, cricket, soccer, football and the Wii! I got to see Taylor interact with the other boys, and felt like he is finally settling in. He may have not found one real close friend, he is on his way-Let's hope his new friends walk a straight line (and not chase the rainbow, just kidding)!
Lines, lines, lines...what a crazy thing to be worried about!

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

25 Things That Make Me Happy...

If you are a Face Book junkie, you have seen the questionnaire that is circling titled "25 Interesting Things About Me"- Well, I have decided to change it a bit. February is the month of love and happiness, so I decided to tell you 25 things that make me happy!
Here is my list of what makes me the happiest....
1. Pat, He can always make me smile and laugh! He is quite the optimist, a loyal friend and a very hard worker!
2. Taylor, I could not be prouder to call him mine. He is a kind and respectful boy, with a heart full of love for his sister(In fact, tonight after he went to bed, I told Claire to go to her bed-I found her snuggled in Taylor's)! He is an incredible athlete, he wows me with his ability!
3. Hunter, What can I say-the freckles and missing tooth can melt your heart! He is a big Momma's boy who is extremely sweet and loving. He is a perfectionist but can also be a mess, and is tough as nails-do not mess with him!
4. Claire, She is our princess, but her own person; very stubborn and strong willed! Amazes me with her continued progress, she is a fighter! God gave me her for a reason- I am a better, more patient mom because of her.
5. My friends, I have many that make me smile, but a few that I could not live without-My friend Cristen is one of them. She made my last few years in Bossier all that much better! I need to try harder to keep my friendships alive, they are way to important to let 8 eight hours time difference, and 24 hours flying time get in the way! (And besides, I could NEVER,EVER find another Lisa Wilhite)
6. My family. I love and miss my mom and dad so much it hurts, they were/are vital to my children- especially Taylor! I love and miss my brother, I have got to try harder to keep in touch. My sister, I could not be prouder of where she is today(good luck with school), I love and miss her terribly!
7. Pat's Mom and Dad, I love them and my children are extremely lucky to have them!
On a lighter note..
8. I love a cup of coffee, it is one of the first things I have in the morning, and it is the first thing we make after dinner.
9. I love sunlight, I have to have all of my windows and blinds open first thing in the morning! Pat always opens our bedroom windows so I can see the sunlight and flowers when I wake up!
10. I love flowers, in and out. I always have fresh flowers through out my house. Pat has been bringing me some every other week for awhile now(SPOILED)!
11. I love a clean house, I do not function in a mess!
12. I love to clean and am always cleaning and straightening, even though we now have a maid three days a week.
13. I love peanut butter, chocolate and Diet Coke-I should slow down on all three!
14. I love to shop, house stuff and presents!
15. I love to shop for my kids clothes, I think they should always look decent! There's nothing like a Polo shirt and khakis or plaid for my boys, and oh the smock dresses! I also like funky and fun for Claire-I do hate to have any of them look like anyone else (Not a problem in SA)
16. I love to get lost in a book, I wish I could make more time to read!
17. I love the feel of sunshine on my face, my favorite thing is to sit outside and soak in a few rays!
18. Sundays! I love to go to church, I love to have my family together and dressed up. It is a vital part of my week, sadly I have yet to find a church that I like here. It is the best way to finish the weekend, and to start fresh on a new week!
19. I love to be with my family alone, I love when it is just us doing stuff-it brings us so much closer!
20. I love to hang out in my backyard, there is nothing like grilling (South Africans call it a Braii) and watching the kids play and swim!
21. I love being from the south, although everyone teases me about my accent-I love it. I want my boys to be raised as southern gentleman and Claire to be a southern princess. It is a part of me that I hope to always have and remember-southern born and bred!
22. I love living in a small town, I enjoy knowing everyone-always running into someone you know!
23. Shocker-I love South Africa! It has a small town feel, it is beautiful, and what a place to have an adventure! It is not like anything I ever imagined, but is actually a wonderful family oriented place. The people are extremely kind, the weather is awesome-We have been blessed to be sent on a journey that I never could have given my children!
24. I am sentimental about things in my house; my grandmother's dining room table that Pat refinished one summer, my parent's secretary, my grandmother's silver, a painted silver chest from my mom's best friend that died recently, a chenille quilt of Claire's that was Pat's moms when she was a baby, a bird that was Pat's grandmothers! Pat and I have worked for everything we own, and I have a great respect for our possessions-hence, the reason I am a neat freak!
25. I love to talk! To friends, to my kids, to my husband. I would probably talk to the wall if I had to!
These are some of the things that make me happy, I thank God every day for my blessings!

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Happier for now!

Well as soon as I wrote the words, Taylor came home with a smile! After school on Friday, he looked much happier, and says that he likes school! I am hoping this lasts! I have decided that I am going to have a party for all of the boys in his class-call me a FOOL! I am going to have a Come Meet the American Kid party with swimming, basketball, Wii and a little pizza(probably a lot), and anything else that could make a fifth grader think we are cool! My hope is that this will open some doors for him, maybe give us a chance to meet some parents.
Wish me luck with this, as I am sure I will be cussing myself all week!
This roller coaster of life that we live, sometimes we feel on top of the world and other times we feel like we are at the bottom! I will say that moving as a child gave me the tools to meet anyone, and really try hard to find connections!
Another great thing that happened to Taylor this week is that his school had an "Athletics's Day", much like field day, and Taylor swept the floor with these kids and won two first place in running!
I am looking forward to a much easier week, yeah right, but at least one without tears! Maybe God answered some of my prayers this week!

Friday, January 30, 2009

Some Days Are Harder Than Others...



Today I question our monumental decision! Have I done the right thing by moving my family? Can I uproot my children with out ruining their little lives? Will they suffer emotionally? These are the questions I ask myself today, as I am facing my sad little boy! Taylor has been having an extremely tough time going back to school. He has been in tears every morning since school began. To give you some background, Taylor has always been my child who has had several friends, and fits in easily in most situations. He was the one that we could never keep home on the weekends, he was always being invited somewhere with someone. He had a couple of real close friends, but could name a ton if you asked him who his buddies were! Taylor was involved with every sport, and had friends in everyone!
Taylor has yet to find any connections here, he has become extremely attached to me(God love him), and does not want to leave me. How do I make this easier for him? I do not know, the hardest part of all of this, is that I know EXACTLY how he feels! My family moved when I was entering seventh grade and then when I was entering eleventh grade! I remember how extremely tough it was, and how much I hated it! It took me awhile to find friends, but I always felt like the outsider!
I watch him at school, and it breaks my heart, I want so bad to make these kids welcome him with open arms! These kids do not seem very willing to want to know him, they have their friends in place, and he is an outsider!
Have you met my baby? He is an extremely kind and respectful kid! He is also pretty cool, and can play almost any sport, and I think he is pretty damn handsome to boot.
So today, I find myself in tears trying to figure out a way to make this better. As moms, we want to fix any problem our babies have! I would give my life to make him happy.
While we were preparing for our move, a cultural trainer came to our house to help us with "culture shock', and one of the things she said was that everyone would have hard moments, and they may come at different times. Well, this is Taylor's turn! Please say a prayer for my baby, a prayer that he will have a good day and want to go back on Monday!
These are the days I want to go home! I also miss my friends and the connections I had, but at the end of the day all I need is my family! I will be OK, will he?

This is a common sight at our house, Taylor is always so sweet to Claire. Taylor is my pride and joy!